Gladys was thrilled when her daughter-in-law gave birth to twins. She imagined weekends filled with laughter, cuddles, and the joy of being a grandmother. But what began as loving support quickly spiraled into unpaid, full-time childcare.
At first, she helped willingly—babysitting, cleaning, and rocking babies to sleep. But soon, she was expected to show up constantly, without notice or appreciation. Her daughter-in-law treated her like a live-in nanny, handing her diapers and babies the moment she walked in. When Gladys tried to set boundaries, she was guilted with lines like, “You’re their grandma. This is what grandmas do.”
The breaking point came when Gladys saw a Facebook post from her daughter-in-law: a photo of her asleep with a diaper on her shoulder, captioned “Here is my built-in free babysitter. This woman makes weekend outings with my gals possible.” The post, filled with poop and heart emojis, made Gladys feel invisible—valued only for what she could provide.
She finally confronted her daughter-in-law: “I love you and the twins. But I’m your mother-in-law, not your employee. I’m a grandma, not a free nanny.” Her honesty was met with accusations of selfishness, but Gladys stood firm. She decided to use her savings for a vacation instead of family expenses. Now, she’s enjoying peace, solitude, and the freedom she’d been denied.
Gladys wonders if this makes her a bad grandmother. But she knows love doesn’t mean servitude. It means showing up with joy—not obligation.
